Enough!

The universe needs to stop fucking with me and my friends. LEAVE US ALONE, UNIVERSE. We've really had enough, thank you. You've been extra shitty to us this year, and I'm telling you, KNOCK IT OFF. WE CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE.

2007 had better be an improvement, you guys.

*Special notes to the people involved —— I'm thinking of you both. Call me if you need anything.

Phototastic!

So, I was looking around JJ's site again today as part of my ongoing effort to avoid doing actual work (OK, half lie. I'm waiting for a program to load and it's taking forever. So I'm surfing the web in the meantime) and discovered that he's conducting a series of workshops.

I'm thinking of taking the workshop this coming Saturday. Part of me is really scared of the notion of going to take a class with him -- like what if he says "Katie, your photography is boring and ridiculous"? -- and the other part of me is quite thrilled with the notion of learning things from my favorite local photographer. If you're interested in learning more about photography, though, I would recommend his workshops as he is quite brilliant.

I think I'm going to do it.


Also, I've updated my Flickr.

Big Doi, Lifetime

So I've been watching this Lifetime movie while I do some writing (shut up. There's nothing on TV on Monday nights), and it has the typical story line-- strong woman detective whose scarred from her past, serial killer targeting women up drudging up the detective's old demons, she's trying to catch him but everyone thinks she's too close to the case, blah, blah, blah, saucy old lady for comic relief, blah, blah, blah, handsome partner who you know she'll end up with in the end, you know the drill.

Here's the thing. This "mystery" is so transparent that I've known who the killer is since the first five minutes. It's the coroner. Yes, the same coroner whose been working on the bodies. Yes it's him. This is how he knows how not to leave any DNA traces. Detective lady, you've been standing right next to him the whole freakin time. Stop standing in your apartment drinking wine and furrowing your brow while looking at crime scene photos. It's the coroner. How dumb are you and your police staff? IT'S THE CORONER.


CORONER, CORONER, CORONER. HE'S THE KILLER.

God, at least give me some concealment or puzzle here.

Are you freakin' kidding me?!?!

So much for "Peace on Earth and good will towards men."

What's been going on

Gary said to me last night, "I think you're avoiding me."

"I'm not avoiding you," I replied, "I'm just busy and hectic and crazy."

That's the way I feel about you, dear blog. So here's what's been going on:

• Thanksgiving, food, family, happiness, blah
  
  
• Work has reached new levels of hellacious suck. There is so much that I want to tell you all, but you know, it's the internet and I don't want to get fired. Let me put it this way, though: Just when I think that it can't get any more horrible and that there's no possible way I can get treated any worse or be more stressed out, this place surprises me. Again.
  
  
• Yes, yes, I know. And I am, believe me. But there's nothing out there. Trust me. I've been looking every night.
  
  
• Final projects are starting to trickle in for grad school, and I seriously need to apply the seat of my pants to a chair and work like a mofo on them.
  
  
• There is also a ton of stuff that's been floating around my head that I would like to write. See above with applying the seat of my pants to a chair.
  
  
• My one professor from grad school (Talking Stick Woman, for those in the know) wants me to take the one piece I wrote for the class and seek publication for it. This is highly laughable because -- and I'm not just being modest here -- the piece sucks. For real. If I had handed this piece into Dr. McCormick he would have thrown it back in my face. But this woman lets us get away with a lot and the piece was due the week of the Conference so I fudged it, handed it in and hoped for the best. I know exactly how much time and effort I spent on that writing. If she thinks that it can be published (and I know in my head how much better it could be if I actually made an effort), then I guess that says something. Then again, she could just be, you know, misguided. But in the "Operation: Get published" file, I've registered for a writing workshop next semester. This may or may not make me carry around my laptop at all times and be in a constant state of writing.
  
  
• Speaking of "Operation: Get published," I've begun submitting my photography to places. Well, just one place, so far. But it's a step! Keep fingers crossed for me.
  
  
• Speaking of photography, my uncle and I kept up our Black Friday tradition and went thrift store shopping in Lebanon. And keeping with our thrift store tradition, we each bought cameras. 3 of the four cameras purchased still had film in them. I love when that happens. Because while it's probably nothing, it could be something. I bought a retro camera and that still had film in it, and I am dying to get that done. Only problem -- does anyone know where I can get 126 film developed? Exactly. Finding a place to get 120 film done was hard enough.
  
  
• Happy Birthday, Kelly and Luke!
  
  
• Monica came to Thanksgiving from Ireland and brought everyone presents. Obviously she knows the way to our hearts: bribery. She brought me Irish magazines and Revels, God love her. Ignore what those reviewers are saying, by the way. Raisin ones are good, coffee ones are good, orange ones are obviously the best.
  
  
• Special shout-out to Mare -- I'm thinking of you this week, kiddo.

That's about it everyone. I hope your Thanksgivings were warm and filled with lots of sweet Tryptophan.

Sew Crafty!

About twice a year, my crafting gene kicks in and I feel the need to make junk. This usually coincides with my nesting instinct reaching its limit and my uncontrollable urge to be all "woman of the house" sewing crap. This usually happens in the winter. Sewing is just such a cozy indoor activity. Anyway, this weekend I conquered a huge foe: I learned how to knit!



Major kudos to Kittastic for teaching me how to knit! Knitting is one of those things I feel like I should be instantly good at and when I’m not I get very frustrated. I feel I should be good at knitting because my Nana was amazing with knitting and crocheting. When I picture Nana, I can’t do it without seeing yarn in her hands. Never mind the fact that she tried to teach me when I was 10 and got frustrated because I’m left handed and deemed me unteachable. This should be in my blood. Like the thrift store gene. So about a year ago I bought a knitting starter kit complete with how-to DVD and vowed to learn how to knit.

Yeah, learning from a DVD? Not that easy.

I spent a lot of time making knots and tangles that slid right off the needles and since I didn’t have a human sitting next to me to say, "Oh, this is what you’re doing wrong," I got frustrated and gave up and learned how to crochet instead. Which, trust me, crocheting is a lot easier.

On Friday a bunch of us were having dinner at the Cheesecake Factory. My crafting urge was raging so I leaned over and said to Kittastic, "I want you to teach me how to knit."

And Kittastic said, "I would love to teach you how to knit!"

And I said, "I am coming over to your place tomorrow and I’m bringing my knitting needles and yarn and I AM GOING TO LEARN HOW TO KNIT, DAMNIT!"

And Kittastic said, "Yay!"

So that’s what we did. Kittastic is a very good teacher. I learned two different ways to cast on and the garter stitch.



This isn’t going to be anything, it’s just for practice. I still have a lot of practicing to do. Once you get the basic steps down, you just need to find a rhythm and dexterity. Which is where I’m running into problems. Kittastic spent a lot of time harping on me about my tension and the way I flow yarn into the needles. See, I’m having issues of how to hold my yarn. While there’s no one way to hold the extra yarn, I am somehow doing it wrong. I’m having trouble finding a comfortable way to hold it and yet still feel like I have control over it. Right now I’m sort of wrapping it around all of my fingers which leads to a lot of readjusting, which leads to loss of tension, which leads to crappy knitting. I think I just need to practice more and once I get used to it more, I’ll have figured something out. I’m going to practice my garter stitch and in about a week or so Kit will teach me the purl stitch!



I also tore apart my crochet project this weekend and began a new one. See, I was making just a long green rectangle, and I sort of absently thought it would be a scarf or something. But then I thought, I have enough scarves and this green doesn’t match any of my coats or anything. But it does match my comforter. So I tore apart my long rectangle and began making that snakey looking thing, which will eventually be a blanket.



I am getting pretty good at the crocheting, I think. My stitches are pretty tight and even. Ooooh, this is going to be such a warm blanket, I can’t wait. I hate the cold. I hope I don’t run out of yarn.

I also wanted to make something for the Doc. I had been wanting to write a letter to him but also give him something cool to look at — hospital rooms are so drab. So I made him this postcard mosaic:



Please ignore my obviously un-vacuummed carpet. I made 20 4" x 6" postcards and printed this image of the Sacred Heart (he collects Sacred Heart stuff) on them, broke up my message into sections, wrote them out, laminated the cards, and mailed them. I hope he gets them before Thanksgiving. I also hope none of the cards get lost. Oh man, he’ll probably kill me for making him do a puzzle. But I figure this way it’s not just a postcard, it’s religious folk art! Wait, is it considered folk art if you do it intentionally? I never took his Religious Folk Life class, so I don’t know. Oh well, it’s fun to look at, right?

Post-op

Tree wrote recently, "The past two days have felt like two weeks," and boy, is she right. Yesterday was the longest day.

So. Yesterday was quite a dramatic day. But the long and short of it is that the Doc is out of surgery and the doctors are calling it a "success." The surgery went for something crazy like 14 hours as the cancer had spread further than they initially thought and they had some extra work to do. But the doctors feel confident that they got it all, and that's what's important. I would like to once again publicly issue a giant "Fuck you" to cancer, recorded here for all posterity. So there it is. Kiss off, cancer. And now the long road of recovery begins...

I would like to thank all of you for putting up with what has got to be the most depressing run of entries. But I'm writing about it for a reason -- he's such an influential and important person in my life, this blog would not be complete without me writing about it.

I've spent the last 4 days crying. No more. I had a little "Sack up, Ho" conversation with myself this morning and the time for tears is done. I'm still sad and I still feel like crying, but I refuse to give cancer the satisfaction. No. Now there's work to be done, it's time to get our friend well.

Quiet little prayers

Please, please, please remember The Doc in your thoughts and prayers today. He is undergoing an intense 9-hour surgery today, one that will change his life forever and ultimately change the way he interacts with students and uses his gift for teaching.

At the healing service on Friday, The Doc said something along the lines of, "Change is inevitable. I will be returning to you in four months greatly altered and changed physically, but what will not have changed is my spirit and presence on this campus."

I know. He's so brave. And people, you cannot imagine the sadness.

He's the smartest person I know, and the most brilliant caring teacher.

Please remember my friend today. Remember him in your good thoughts, in your prayers, in your energy, in your hearts. I'm begging you. He needs it.

Awful

It's 6am and I'm awake because I've been awake all night. Until 3:30am I was at the Doc's house helping him organize and get ready. Now I'm sitting here trying to write him a letter -- something to take with him to New York, something so he knows just how amazing he is and how much I care about him -- and I can't do it. This is so hard. How do you tell someone you care about and respect so much what they mean to you before they go into life-altering surgery? How do you tell your mentor how much they have guided you? I can't do this. Everything is coming out trite and cheesy. I'm a fucking ENGLISH GRADUATE STUDENT I should be able to do this. I can't do this.

This is so awful. I wish I could take it away from him. I wish I could make him better. I don't know what to do.

After tomorrow, I will never hear his voice again.

I'm crying.

Glee

OH MY GOD, IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS!!

I don't know who this Gates fella is, and I don't much like him based on his background, but I am glad that The Redhead's prediction of Lieberman being offered the position so that Connecticut's Republican govenor could nominate a Republican senator to take his place and thus regain controll of the Senate did not come true.

Midterm Midtacular!

YES YES YES!!!!!

Mood: Jubilant

Faith in the Process: Restored, although I still beleive that we need to stop making it such a rigamole to vote.

Outlook: Hopeful, for the first time in 6 years.

Ya done good, PA

PA, I am proud to call you my state. Way to be blue through and through. Even in my district, a notoriously red blip in the blue sea surrounding it, brought a Dem in.

Wheee! No more Rick Santorum! FUCK YOU, Rick Santorum, and your Republican woman-hating homophobic bullshit nonsense. Please let the door hit you on the ass on your way out.

I should not be this gleeful just yet. But I am. Lord knows the last time I was this excited after an election, I woke up the next day bitterly disappointed. Returns are still coming in, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed. But so far so good.

Why I've lost faith in the voting process

For real, why does this have to be so fucking hard?

And yet every other year they bitch about low voter turn out. GEE, I WONDER WHY? Maybe it's because you make us jump through 13 billion hoops just to cast a damn vote. Also, for God's sake, it's been 2 years or so since the last major election. We had problems then, did we work them out? Nooooo. Of course not. Because THAT WOULD MAKE SENSE.

I will not be surprised in the slightest if Republicans steal another fucking election because of this. Yeah, you heard me. Buying into the conspiracy theories and all.

Canada has the right idea, man. Give me a paper ballot, let me mark it and then stick it in a box. No muss, no fuss. I think that's why I like voting by absentee ballot so much. Because I am confident that a machine didn't fuck it up for me. Now, if only I could be sure that it would be counted...

Accentuate the positive

Things are kind of icky around here. I don't want to talk about it. So I am going to focus on the two things that are making me happy.

First, SOCKS!



My socks are fun today. Yes, I know how pathetic it is when socks are my happy thing of the day, but I'll take my pleasures where I can find them, damnit. Actually, this is a trick that was taught to me by QK. When you're feeling nervous or sad, put fun socks on or paint your toenails a wacky color. Then, when you're feeling down during the day wiggle your toes and remind yourself that you have a secret that no one else can see. It seems silly, but it works wonders.

Second, the trailer for this movie starring my imaginary boyfriend. Shut up, I'm allowed to have an imaginary boyfriend, because Lord knows...wait, I said I wasn't going to get into the ickyness. Anyway, this trailer showed up in the previews before The Queen (OK, wait, technically three things that are making me happy. The Queen was excellent and I recommend it highly. I'm calling it now -- Helen Mirren is getting an Oscar for this performance. If she doesn't, it will be scandalous) and I did a silent little squee in the theater and The Doc nudged me and said, "Oh LOOK!" Even The Doc knows. Shameful. Anyway, don't you think my imaginary boyfriend looks all dashing in 1920s clothing? Trust me, he does. And it makes me happy SO STOP LOOKING AT ME THAT WAY.

Is it wrong that I really want to go home and drink my face off?

Horrible sounds

ClickClickClickClickClick

That's the sound I heard when I turned the key in the ignition of my car. Looks like Albus needs a new starter. Awesome, you guys. Of course I don't have the money for a new starter. So that's a fun little wrinkle.


AhwuHuwaheckth!

The sound that The Doc makes, thanks to the cancer. The surgery has been scheduled and we're tearing the cancer out like a mofo. Sadly, we also have to tear out everything else too, including the vocal chords. I say "we" as if I'm actually going through it or performing the surgery instead of just the crazy ex-student who's helping him organize his house before he goes.


This is the world we live in...

Disturb's cover of Genesis' "Land of Confusion" My God is that an AWFUL song. I liked the original, but the cover is so terrible I don't even know what to say about it. And of course, it's being played on the radio every 5 minutes for reasons that elude me. Go away, Disturbed, and stay there.

It's OK...they know me there

Another YouTube post because....LOVE. I saw this years and years ago. Like, back when I was in high school. I sort of forgot that it even existed and stumbled upon it when I was looking for something completely different.



YAY!

Oh WHATEVER, Sue Miller

For reasons unknown even to me, I read my horoscope fairly often. Not daily, but usually weekly, and definitely monthly. I’m not sure why I do this, other than that it’s a little addiction and I guess deep down I want to believe in them.

Anyway, according to my monthly horoscope from Sue Miller, October was supposed to be, like, the month of Big Love. I was going to meet some wonderful wonderful man who was going to sweep me off of my feet and we were going to go off and do all sorts of romantical things together. My awesome love days were supposed to start on or around October 20th.

Now. If you are close to me or work with me you know about the events surrounding October 20th. Those days were not romantic, filled with love, and certainly did not bring about the love of my life or anything like that. Words to describe those days are words such as “shitty,” really shitty,” “embarrassing,” “icky,” and “further destroying my faith in the male species.” Big Love, my ass.

Now get a load of November’s horoscope:

This could be a wonderful month, one you may remember for a very long time. Your password in November will be “twosome,” dear Taurus. Does this mean you will get engaged or married in November? Possibly! At the very least, if you are dating someone seriously, the topic should come up. Let things happen naturally without pushing - with a crowd of little happy planets all singing, "Let's run away to the Elvis Chapel in Las Vegas!" have faith that things will happen as they should. You will know where you stand with the one you love by month's end.

Good news, you guys! I’m getting engaged to my non-existent boyfriend! We’re having a Vegas wedding and you’re ALL invited! We're registered at Spinsters 'R Us, and we've already chosen an awesome china pattern, one with cute little-kitty cats circling the edge of the plate and batting at little balls of yarn with their paws! We already have a bread machine though, so don't worry about that.