Photography Class

The delightful, generous, and always hilarious duo of Jim and Stephanie gifted me with a two-hour private photography lesson for my birthday. IKNOWRIGHT? I am stoked, to say the least.

I need to take a portfolio of images with me for assessment so I'd like some recommendations. What say you? Do you have a favorite photo that I've taken? Let me know!

Softly Softly catchy monkey

Oh hell.

It's nearly April, and I already feel so much slipping away from me. Back in January, I vowed to take a photography class and have photo essays/submissions ready for May and...I have done none of that.

I've been stuck in a photography rut for a long, long time. Not just the "I don't want to touch my camera" burnout, but also a technique rut. In which I do the same things over and over again. My camera is perpetually in automatic mode, I use my 55mm lens constantly, and I never use my flash. It's not a "style," it's a habit, and a bad one. I recently went through the photos I took for The Scotsman during his black belt test and the photos I took for my brother of Gagarin Way and was totally disappointed with how they all came out.





Above: Two examples of my incompetence and amateur habits coming back to haunt me.

*Sigh*

I had plans to take a spring photography class with Chester County night school, which cost roughly $140, but that plan disintegrated when my finances took a nose dive.

I am feeling so frustrated with my life lately. Since we're on lockdown, I can openly bitch that a large portion of this is my job. I can't tell you how miserable I am right now. I don't mean to sound churlish, because ultimately this place has taught me a lot and I'm grateful to have a job at all in this economy, but seriously: I have had enough. I'm tired of the yo-yo-ing between having nothing to do to OHMYGODDOITALLRIGHTNOW, seriously sick of the crappy treatment my department gets, I am not getting paid nearly enough, and I am completely over the lack of competent communication here.

About two weeks ago one of my editors pulled me into a meeting because I was "on the [blog name] team." To which, I said, "Um." Because, literally, for the first ten minutes of this meeting I had no earthly idea what he was talking about. Seems my company decided to launch a new blog and I was supposed to work on the photos and images for it except no one decided to tell me. Or my manager, for that matter. The editor kept saying [blog name] over and over again and I kept giving him confused looks because to me he was just stringing three random nouns together. This would have been bad enough, but added onto that, they needed photos right away and after my initial scramble to find images I realized that I (1) had not been given the proper URL for the
site, and (2) I didn't have a login or password for the site to upload photos anyway.

Can you imagine how embarrassing all of that was for me? Can you imagine how frustrated my manager felt when I explained what was going on? When she complained about it, she was told that the reason we weren't notified about the new site or my duties, was because "so much changes with these sites and they don't want to bother [us] until things are settled." Which I called out to be the lamest fucking excuse ever. That blog has a team of, like, 6 people, all of whom were consistently kept in the loop while the site was developed. How fucking hard is it to add me or my manager to the email list? Or if not through the whole development of the site, than shooting an initial email of "Hey heads up we're launching a new blog. Site name and launch date TBD." It took me less than a minute to type that all out, and yet, they can't be buggered.

While I realize that communication problems occur at every office, shit like this has been happening nonstop for over 2 years now. It's gone from annoying to obnoxious to frustrating and now it feels blatantly disrespectful. The communication issue has been really getting my goat, because we voice our concerns and complain about it, we're assured that things will get better...and we continue to get the shaft. This is especially galling as my company publishes a couple publications dedicated to better communication with employees. Hello, irony! Nice to see you again.

Worst of all, I have the creepy feeling that I am on a sinking ship. I think we jumped on the internet bandwagon way too late (well, duh), and I am confident we are marketing a lot of our products incorrectly. The fact that we are still, in this day and age, selling our publications via telemarketing and there is no way to purchase subscriptions online, is beyond retarded.

So needless to say, I've been looking for a new job. I had thought with my master's degree I would sail into a new position, however, given the state of the economy, I might as well have gotten a master's degree in etching stone tablets. The publishing jobs are few and far between, and so many of them are beyond what I feel is my experience, either in terms of design or web requirements. If you know of a job working for either a book or magazine publisher* (university, textbook, medical, whatever) doing production, proofreading, design, layout and light web work, PLEASE, let me know about it. I am desperate. Also, anyone want to hold a résumé party? Mine needs work.

Despite all of these frustrations, I am trying to be patient. Both with myself and the universe at large. "Different frogs, different times," as Gareth Keenan would say.

I finally gave up and renegotiated my student loans, which has been the main source of my financial troubles. I had been dragging my feet about doing it because I was worried that doing so would add more interest/take me longer to pay them off, but finally I had no choice. I'm glad I did it, and it's already working out much better for me. Plus, although my payments will go up in 2 years, it will still take me the same amount of time and interest to pay them off. Woo!

Because I now have a tighter reign on finances, I can look into taking a photography class this summer perhaps. I can also start making serious moves towards Irish dancing again. Back in February at the Irish/Scottish festival, I located a school in Bridgeport that's willing to teach adults and my initial reaction was, "I'm there!" But, while the lessons are reasonably priced (for Irish dancing) I discovered that I need new soft shoes which can be anywhere from $40-$65 and need to be shipped from Ireland. So... dancing took a back seat too. Which is a shame because I've been faltering on gym attendance (exercise is so fucking boring, I hate it), and my fat is creeping back to dangerous levels. But now! I think I may be back in business!

As far as photography goes, I'm trying to give myself a break. Like, Rome wasn't built in a day. And occasionally, when I'm not paying attention and relaxing with my camera, I can accidentally take a really nice photo:



Above: Sarah Rose, giggling at our 12th Annual Chinese New Year Lunch

I've just scheduled two new photo jobs with the N Crowd in April, one of which is for their Anniversary show. $ for photos = A very good thing.

This weekend is a special Silver Stars field trip to see Silver RavenWolf at Celtic Myth and Moonlight, with stops at Bey's Rock Shop and possibly Zern's Farmer's market. I've never been to any of these places, and as I was considering the trip this morning I had the urge that I should bring my camera, for fun. FUN and my CAMERA. In the same thought process! I call this progress.

Spring is here, so I'm feeling optimistic about possibilities. I'm working on an über seekrit project with Stephanie and Melissa, which shall be grand fun. Inis Nua has a reading on Monday night, which I'm looking forward to. And then their spring show, Bedbound, opens next month and I suspect it shall be awesome. I'm getting a pedicure tonight to make my toes purty. I get to try on and purchase my bridesmaid dress for Renee's wedding so very soon. We're ditching crap-ass Verizon and getting Comcast and thus, cable again. Gary is back to doing art work so I plan to be inspired by him. Spring is a time of new beginnings, yes? Then let's get started.

*I am also open to suggestions for where to look for a job. I'm currently combing Monster, HotJobs, CareerBuilder, BookJobs.com, HigherEdJobs.com (for University Presses and alumni/PR publications), and GraduateJobs.com Any other suggestions on where I can look?

Luke and Leslie: Married!

Things have been relatively quiet around this blog. Because...well, I don't know. I guess because I don't have a whole lot to write about? It's winter, so I'm not doing very much aside from actively trying to stay warm and eating many starchy cheese-filled food items. And...my laptop broke, so I can no longer update at home. And my boyfriend's soon-to-be ex wife is kind of cyber-stalkery. Also, none of you are exactly commenting these days and we're all locked down and shit, so I think there's exactly 4 of you reading this right now. HELLO.

All of those things contribute to the perfect storm of me not posting.

But, in an effort to distract myself from the snowicane* we are apparently not getting, I thought I would finally (FINALLY) post the photos from Luke and Leslie's wedding.

I'm not going to lie to you. I was terrified about this wedding. Of all of the weddings in Wedding Palooza '09, I worried about this one the most. Because while, I adore him and while he can sometimes be a bit hammy, Luke isn't always thrilled by a camera. He can be very shy, especially when it comes to things like "smiling." And posing him or asking him to smile just make it worse. And add on all the romantic mushy stuff? Well Luke turns into a turtle practically, all hiding in his little shell. I knew how important this day was to both of them and I was desperate to do well. Adding on to the pressure was the fact that Luke and Leslie had a completely private ceremony, all by themselves, with the exception of me and if they were kind enough to let me see them get married, I had better not fuck it up so help me god, I'd never forgive myself.

So that's basically what was going through my head the entire time I was prepping for this wedding.

But I need not have worried.

Because the day? Was awesome. And Luke? Was so joyful about getting married to Leslie that he didn't have time to be self-conscious about the camera and the two of them were just so freaking sweet the entire time, I kept Awwwwww-ing behind my camera and tearing up.

Luke and Leslie asked me to come over to photograph their "getting ready" for the big day. When I walked in, Luke was watching episodes of "Married with Children," which I thought was hilarious. They started off with a doughnut breakfast for their last un-married morning:



Luke and Leslie both incorporated mementos of their grandparents into their wedding outfits.



Chucks and rings!





Leslie rocked a corset.



LOOK AT THE STYLISH MOFO THAT IS LUKE:



Then it was time to go get married.









Yeah, I totally cried behind my lens. I'M A SAP, SO SUE ME.





I adore this picture of Luke smiling so wide as Leslie slips the ring on his finger. Look how happy! Real Luke smile! With TEETH!



You guys, awwwwwww.



Love them!




Onto the reception!





Their cake was a haunted house!















The Stevenson men, showing their love for the Phightin' Phills! (Who at that time, were well on their way to the World Series.)





Instead of smashing cake into each others' faces, Luke and Leslie smashed it into the best man's and maid of honor's faces. Surprise!







The rain couldn't stop us from getting our dance on.



All of us Cabrini Kids, together. Aww.

Congrats, Luke and Leslie! Thanks for letting me photograph your big day!

*Cecily Tynan literally called it that.

How Philly Moves

Exciting events are afoot (pun totally intended) for my photographer friend J.J. Tiziou! His project, How Philly Moves, is about to make an exciting announcement.

I know some of the details, but I am sworn to secrecy. I can tell you the following:

1. It's a fantastic blend of community, diversity, and art.
   
2. It will pretty up some very blah places.
   
3. It will perfectly capture the reckless joy and beauty of dance.
   
4. J.J. is awesome.
   
5. I hope to help him in this project.

So if you're available tomorrow, visit the City Hall in Mayor's Reception Room for a dance party and an announcement. Personally, I will be cursing my 9-5. And chair dancing.

My boyfriend can totally beat up your boyfriend*

So, The Scotsman? Just got his third degree black belt. Bear with me a bit, because I'm going to brag.

It was kind of a big deal this test, because he'd been waiting to take it for close to 9 years. He should have actually taken it about 4 years ago but between his own students and Tae Kwon Do club, not to mention his full-time job and family responsibilities, it kept getting pushed back and pushed back. So the fact that he was finally able to take it was pretty damn special and I was honored that he asked me to come and take photos**.

The test took over 4 hours, which I sort of can't wrap my head around. Don't ask me how he made it through the ordeal, because I would have given up after the first couple of forms and sat myself down with some girl-scout cookies or something and just been satisfied with my two degrees. But he kept going and going and was generally awesome the entire time.

The final portion of the test was the breaking. The Scotsman was the last to go and he was the one breaking the most boards. Prior to The Scotsman's turn, the other students (who were mostly testing for their first degrees) kept not breaking. And they were only trying to break one board. As each of them hit difficulties and had to re-try over and over, I got more and more nervous. Because The Scotsman was breaking 4 boards with his elbow, immediately followed by 3 with a kick, followed by 2 with a different kick (technical term). Grand total of 9 boards for those of you not adding along.

By the time The Scotsman got up there to do his thing, I was pretty edgy. A hush fell over the entire room as he set up the boards, and I overheard a little girl say with awe, "Mom, you HAVE to get a picture of this. He's going to break 4 BOARDS!"

The Scotsman's mom was biting her nails at this point, and I was holding my breath.

But of course, I had nothing to be worried about:



If you look in the mirror, you can see that it takes the strength of 3 burly men to handle the impact. Those boards? Completely broken.

The two kicks went perfectly too:



And let me just tell you, the cheer that went up afterward? Epic. After my heart started beating again, I realized that I had been silly. The Scotsman has been known to break up to 6 boards with his elbow, so those 4? Were like butter.







I might be just a bit proud, you guys.

And then, the next day, The Scotsman cooked me breakfast:



Wearing the belt, obviously. Because you kind of have to.

<3

*He wouldn't, of course, because that goes against the tenants of Tae Kwon Do. But he could, is my point.

** I'm fairly disappointed with how the pictures came out, actually. Too bad his girlfriend is an amateur. Ugh.

Favorite Shots, 2009

Oh, 2009. I sort of don't know how to feel about you. You were a weird year for me, what with graduating, getting my heart bruised, starting a new and more promising relationship, gaining new roomies, acting in a play in the Fringe, traveling to Chicago, and doing a metric fuckton of photography. Let's look back, shall we?

(and if you thought the last photo post was huge...hang onto your butts)



Publicity photo for Skin Deep, which ended up being published in the Philadelphia Inquirer!











Murder! with original Woodrow, Shawn.



Short hair! I'll let you guys in on a secret: I'm thinking about getting this done again today.

















Made in China photos, which are some of the best I've taken for my brother.



MASSSSTER!

































Murder!, the final fight call. I had such a great time with these people doing this silly show.



...Although it took a lot out of me.



And oh my god, these adorable people, WHO JUST GOT ENGAGED. (I can finally talk about this, as it's been an über seekrit until they informed all the family members. SO EXCITED! SO HAPPY!)













Leslie wins the award for "Funniest Moment in a Bathroom" of 2009. I know that sounds gross and weird, but trust me, it was hilarious.



Mark Doherty!









(Since I just posted photos from Mike and Haven's wedding yesterday, I'm going to refrain from re-posting them all again and just post this one. Suffice to say I have a lot of favorite shots in that set.)



My life, my love, my frog.



I will, however, give you a sneak peak at some of Luke and Leslie's wedding (which, sweet Jesus, I'm still editing these photos –- Leslie, thank you for being SO PATIENT with me). I have to say, this wedding was the one I was worried the most about shooting, but was one of the best to actually do, simply because it was so private, special, and so totally them.





(more of Luke and Leslie's photos will come in a separate post)



















Photos from Inis Nua's "Craic Down," a musical fundraiser. This was such a fun night, and some of my best musical performance photography yet.



Holga experiments...clearly I need more work here.





And finally, some photos from Amaryllis Theatre Company's production of Waiting for Godot.

Phew. It been quite the photogenic year. Next year I want to take a class in photography, learn how to use a fucking flash properly, and experiment more with light drawing. 2010, say cheese.