Open Letter to the ABC/Lost Brain Trust

Dear ABC/Lost Brain Trust,

Stop fucking around with your viewers and get over your damn self already. Last night's episode was horrible. Like, REALLY horrible.

1. To whomever made the promos -- "The 3 Biggest Questions Will Be Answered"? Really? I'm guessing the questions answered were: Do the writers think the viewers are dumb? Has season 3 resoundingly sucked so far? Are the people in charge too busy patting themselves on the back for the first two seasons to put any effort into the current season? The answers to all of the above seems to be "Yes."
   
   
2. To the casting director who hired Bai Ling to play the retarded role of the tattooist who can "see who people really are": You should be fired. She's a sucky actress and watching her and Matthew Fox twisting tongues set off my upchuck reflex.
   
   
3. No one cares about Jack's tattoos. Except maybe Matthew Fox.
   
   
4. FOR GOD'S SAKE I AM SO SICK OF THE SAWYER/KATE/JACK TRIANGLE. I never cared to begin with and it is so painful and old to watch now, I swear to God, Hamlet was more decisive. Just have Kate choose one or the other and lets get on with our respective lives.
   
   
5. Also, shut up, Jack. I used to enjoy him as a character because he seemed to have a lot of complex stuff going on: Daddy issues, abandonment issues, genius surgeon, etc. However, between the end of season two and now you've managed to make him so one note and cartoonish that I hate him. As someone else on some fan forum noted today, Jack's entire character can be summed up by the following: I'm a DOCTOR. Fuck you.
   
   
6. Seeing Cindy and the kids could have been quite dramatic and cool had the promos not given it away. Again, way to go, promo people.
   
   
7. Your viewers are not stupid. We already knew The Others didn't live on the same island as the Hydra Station. We already knew Ben was in charge, no matter what. Stop being all anvilicious about the crap that was explained to us 4 episodes ago.
   
   
8. So they haven't made an appearance yet, but I know for a fact that the annoying twins Nikki and Palo have a flashback episode coming up. This had better be damn good to win me over. I understand having to introduce new characters and all, but the way you did it was so ham-handed and stupid. Not to mention, you made them completely obnoxious and unlikable. I do not have high hopes for that episode at all -- prove me wrong, please.
   
   
9. Same goes for the Locke episode I know is coming up.

For the love of Astro Bars, get it together. You were so smart and suspenseful the first two seasons. I have faith that you can back there again, but man. You are taking a bath in Season 3, guys. Get your heads in the game. I promise I'll stick with you until at least the end of the season. You have until May to prove yourselves worthy of Season 4 with me.

Sheesh,

8K